The Bluey Video Game Is a Bitter Disappointment, And Yet...

Plus, a short announcement: Crossplay is taking the rest of the week off.

As dinner was winding down on Sunday night, I made a big announcements to my kids: the Bluey game was out, and as soon as they were in pajamas, we could all* play. The excitement was something I wish I’d captured on video, but take my word for it.

* Not quite all, sadly. Mom has been sick with COVID, but fortunately, she’s on the mend. 

If you’re reading Crossplay, you probably know Bluey. Heck, most people probably Bluey. The popular Australian cartoon about a family of Blue Heeler dogs is more than just one of the best children's shows, it’s actually one of the best shows on TV—period. The care and attention given to the show’s storytelling about the everyday challenges and delights of being a family is a welcomed fixture in our household.

It’s a show that makes children and parents laugh and think (and cry). It’s important!

Children consume so much crap because they don’t know any better, and children’s entertainment takes advantage by being simple and condescending. Bluey is neither.

You can imagine, then, the excitement around a Bluey video game. But I’m sorry to report the care and attention that makes the TV show special is not present here. Bluey, the show, is an ambitious work. Bluey: The Videogame hardly has any ambitions.

We’re a four-person family—mom, dad, older sister, younger sister—and the Bluey family—mum, dad, older sister, younger sister—maps to ours. This isn’t a Princess Peach situation, where the children fight over roles. They see themselves in Bluey. My oldest identifies with Bluey, and my youngest with Bingo. Saves me a headache!

Bluey: The Videogame is broken up into five “episodes'' set in different locations, but ultimately it’s a larger story about Dad, aka Bandit, trying to find pieces of a treasure map that promises to unearth something from his youth. (It’s the closest the game gets to telling any story at all.) All told, the game lasts less than two hours, unless you become invested in trying to track down all the collectibles hidden in the game.

Fundamentally, the game doesn’t trust the player, which feels antithetical to the show. Every task is highlighted with a glowing icon, and there’s never any mystery about what to do next. As a parent with a profound respect for Bluey, it felt a little insulting. 

But…my kids had a fantastic time. They laughed, screamed, and giggled for nearly two hours. My youngest grew frustrated with being left behind as my oldest zipped around but she was equally happy to play with the (wildly overpriced!) Bluey app on her iPad, having her own coloring adventure while I kept playing the game with my other child. 

Everyone had a smile on their face, including me. 

I recorded our early minutes with the game, as we all tried to figure things out:

(We played on Switch. It seemed to run fine, outside of some long-ish load times. The mashup of 2D and 3D works…okay. I do wonder if it’d look nicer on a better console.)

I’ve played a decent number of video games with my oldest, but we haven’t finished one. Bedtime was approaching while playing Bluey: The Videogame, but my oldest realized we only had two episodes to finish—each takes about 20 minutes, give or take—and asked if we could see it through. That’s never happened and it gave me pause.   

It’s been a hard week. Everyone’s been sad that Mom’s had COVID, and though the rest of us have tested negative, we’ve also been avoiding family and friends, due to the proximity of the Thanksgiving holiday. We’ve all felt frustrated and isolated, and so…fuck it, let’s keep playing. Eventually, we reached the beach and, in essence, the end.

It’s a low bar, but I’ve played the most recent Paw Patrol and Trolls video games and a lot of other games that fall into this same bucket, and man, Bluey: The Videogame isn’t one of those. It’s a video game about wandering familiar-ish locations, like the family’s house, and clicking buttons to interact with objects. There are re-creations of big attractions from the show, like keepy uppy, but there’s no depth to them. 

It’s the ultimate killer to Bluey: The Videogame as a whole: it lacks depth.

$40, on its face, feels like a lot to ask for an experience that ends in a few hours. But earlier that day, I’d spent $40 for my kids to run around a play place for three hours. A few weeks back, I paid more to see the new Paw Patrol movie in theaters. On the plus side, Bluey: The Videogame seems to be on sale at a few places. Takes the sting out.

Bluey: The Videogame is a missed opportunity. But I can’t deny the great time we had.

Some brief news: Crossplay will be taking the rest of the week off. I made a big show of things when I took a few days off in the summer, because it felt like I had to ask permission? But people were so gracious that it no longer feels necessary. And so, I’m taking a few days to recharge, and then we’ll hit the ground running next week.

We’ll even be trying an experiment upon my return: a guest writer on Crossplay! 

Have a story idea? Want to share a tip? Got a funny parenting story? Drop Patrick an email.

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Also:

• I’ll be interested to see if my oldest asks to play it again for the collectibles. When we turned it off, she was bummed. It’s rare she asks to play a game like that.

• Apologies for not getting these impressions faster! I was told I’d have early access to the game, but that access never came, so I ended up just buying it myself.

• Anyone seen the live show for Bluey? It’s coming to Chicago next spring.